The truth about hell
by senorita lopez
Summary: Cera's fate was doomed from the moment she set her eye's on him and her fate was sealed the instant she told him the truth. Read to find out more. Review and tell me what you think, thanks.


Her knees gave out from under her as she bowed down with her hands covering her face. "Please stop!! No more! No more! No more!!" Cera screamed. Fear like non other was gripping her heart. She had never felt this way before. Even when she was faced against Naraku in his dungeon or when she thought Inuyasha was going to die… not even when she was an inch from death. _'Please anything but this'._

Jolon's cold and yet amused voice could be heard above Cera's broken one. "Don't tell me you don't want to know her deepest, darkest secret Inuyasha. The one secret she never wanted you to find out." He smiled that evil smile of his as he looked at the girl on the ground. He loved this. The pain he was causing her was giving him such pleasure.

Inuyasha watched as Cera sank to floor. Watched as Jolon smirked at her. Pain wrenched his heart. He wanted to comfort the girl. '_Why do I want to go to her?_' He took a couple steps and kneeled down to her level to hold her but she jerked out of his hold standing up with wide eyes full of fear looking at him, her hands covering her ears. She started backing up slowly still chanting "no more".

"Why my darling do you not wish Inuyasha to know?" He was having too much fun with this. He was the only one who knew. Oh how she guarded this for so long. He loved the fact that he figured her out where no one else could. Jolon was brought out of his thoughts when he heard the girl yell. " Please I beg you, don't do this!!!"

She didn't care anymore. Maybe if she begged he wouldn't reveal this secret. This embarrassing, fearfull, yet amazing feeling that has been burning her soul for many months now.

Inuyasha was getting even more worried with her sudden outburst. "Cera, what could be so bad that you would grovel at his feet like this. This isn't like you." She looked broken as she looked at him.

"Aww, but Inuyasha, you misunderstand."

'_Just a little longer before I spill. Getting her to beg was shocking to say the least but it made it all the better'._ Jolon snickered. "I never said it was a bad thing. To most people, especially humans it's actually a good thing."

"Shut the fuck up!! Stop dragging this out and spill already if you're going to… or unless you don't really know." Inuyasha finished slyly knowing he hit a nerve when Jolon's eye twitched and his smirk vanished. His glory didn't last long when that smirk came back.

"Oh don't worry Inuyasha. I know and she knows I know. Can't you smell that fear?" Jolon inhaled deeply and his eyes half glazed over. "It's intoxicating."

Inuyasha was sick of this. Sick of the pleasure this demon was getting by her suffering. He had to show that whatever she was trying to keep from him was ok. Nothing to worry about. He walked over to her and stood right in her face. She cast her eyes down so he grasped her chin and forced her to look at him. "Stop acting like a baby. I trust you. Whatever ­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Jolon has to say just tell me yourself. I promise I won't get mad. Just tell me dammit!!!" Cera's eyes widened slightly when she saw Inuyasha's eyes soften some from their usual hard self.

Her fear was still too much. He would hate her if he knew. He would crush her soul. For so long she kept this from him. She couldn't change things no matter what. She will not be responsible for hurting Kagome. She promised herself she would take this secret to her grave…

...but now? Should she really tell him? It's not like it would change things. But it's bad enough with Kikyo and Kagome. What Cera felt… it should never have happened. It wasn't right. It's was wrong in so many ways. It was never suppose to be. She was never suppose to be…here…with him….so close yet so far away. She blushed and moved her chin away from Inuyasha. She couldn't. The look in his eyes was too much. She had to get away. Her body screamed to run so her heart would stop hurting. It burned her soul. Without thinking she ran. Ran towards the entrance and away from Inuyasha.

"Cera!!! Where are you going?!! Come back here!!" Inuyasha totally forgetting about Jolon went after Cera with a new found desire to find out what secret she was keeping. He didn't care. The look in her eyes. He had to know. He exited the cave leaving behind a hideous laughter. He'll deal with him later.

Cera ran. Ran as if death itself was upon her. She had to get away. Away from him. If he kept asking…she didn't now if she could keep this secret. No. She had to. She can't change destiny. She can't change what is suppose to be. She has no right to wish on something that could never be.

So she ran. Ran as fast as her legs would carry her. She ran through brush and wood. Through branches and flowers. She didn't even realize he was behind her till it was too late. She ran into a field, him flying from behind, knocking her down. They both tumbled till Inuyasha had her pinned beneath him. She couldn't run anymore. He wouldn't let her. She was going to tell him whether she likes it or not. He couldn't stand her scent anymore. Filled with so much pain. He had never sensed such pain before. He had to know.

She was stuck. No matter how hard she squirmed to try to get out from under him she couldn't. He trapped her. She shut her eyes and turned her head but he would have none of it. He grasped her chin and yanked her face back towards him. "Open your eyes" he waited. No response so he spoke more sternly. "Open your eyes Cera." Still she didn't. He shook her chin, "Look at me dammit!" She couldn't deny him any longer. Her eyes opened and she looked at him. "That's better. Now tell me what's going on." He took his hand away from her chin thinking he had her but DAMMIT ALL she still fought. She cast her eyes down. With a weak voice she said, "Please, Inuyasha. Don't ask me to tell you."

"I'm not asking…" Cera's eyebrows lowered in confusion. Inuyasha waited till her eyes reached his before finishing… "… I'm telling. You have never kept anything from me before. All your thoughts were there when I asked before. Now they're not. Your making my wonder what could be so bad and I'm starting to think you might have betrayed me somehow." Cera gasped. "No, never! I could never do that! You know that. You know I could never."

"Then what is so bad that you won't tell me?"

Inuyasha at that point wished he never pushed, he didn't want to know now. The look in her eyes. She has never looked so defeated. "Inuyasha…." Cera began. She couldn't hide it anymore. With everything he's been through she rather have him know than think of betrayal. A tear escaped her eye to slide down her face as she reached her hand up to Inuyasha face to feel the warmth of his cheek. "…I could never betray you. " Her hand fell, no longer having the strength to hold itself up. She looked down and another tear escaped. She couldn't look in his eyes when she said this. "…I love you too damn much."

Inuyasha was not expecting that. His eyes widened and totally forgetting why he had to hold her down he plopped his butt on the ground in front of her and stared at Cera as she sat up as well still not looking into his eyes. '_She loves me? Cera loves me? But…isn't love a good thing?_' He had to know the answer. "Why?" His eyebrows lowered when she flinched at his question and still not looking at him she asked back. "Why what?" "Why do you hold so much pain? Love is suppose to be a good feeling. Why, if you love me, do you feel such pain? Do you hate loving me? Does it sicken you to love me?" Now Inuyasha was getting mad with where his train of thought was going. "Am I beneath you because I'm not a full human? Am-" He couldn't finish his last statement because Cera just slapped him!! Him! Inuyasha! '_She just slapped me!!'_ Although it didn't hurt it still shocked him. Now she looked and smelled of rage mixed in with hurt. "How dare you!" She growled. "How dare you say that. Have I not shown you time and time again I think anything but that?! Haven't I proven to you what you mean me to me even if I have never said it!!" Now Cera was really getting pissed. _'How dare he say that I would think of him in such a way._' Her new found energy made her want to stand up so she did towering over Inuyasha while she still screamed at him for his thought. "What more do I have to do?" Now Cera wasn't even thinking about anything. She just let her thoughts come out... not even thinking about the consequences. "You are my world, Inuyasha. My everything. I think and act for no other. You're perfect in every form of the word. I have to use every ounce of strength my body has to get myself from looking away from you. I have to use every ounce of my being to not touch you ears, your face, your hands; to keep my distance. You don't even realize how great you are!!!" Tears once again started to leak out of her eyes as her pain came back ten fold now that she was finally saying it out loud. "You are the one and only guy whom I'd want to spend the rest of my life with but I can't! I can't hold you, can't touch you or tell you that I love you because you belong to another. Your destiny lies with another." Cera's confession no longer held anger now. Just sadness. She reached out her hand as if to touch him but stopped. "You're so close to me Inuyasha and yet…" Once more her hand fell to her side as she looks at her one true love. "And yet, I can never have you. That is why my love for you brings me such pain." Cera lowerd her head in defeat. "To love what you can not have… and to have what you should not love. That... I believe... is true hell."

With that last statement Cera turned around and began walking towards the thickness of the forest knowing that this time… Inuyasha wouldn't follow.


End file.
